As a relationship therapist, I often hear concerns about lingering feelings for an ex. I have had many counseling clients describe how maddening it feels to struggle with concerns your partner still has such unresolved feelings.
While it's common for people to have memories of past relationships, it becomes problematic when the emotional ties go beyond nostalgia and start to impact one's current relationship. Here are four significant red flags that may indicate that a partner still has feelings for their ex—and what you can do about it.
If your partner frequently compares current situations to those they experienced with their ex, it could be a sign that the past relationship is still on their mind. These comparisons may start innocently enough—like comparing a new spot to a favorite restaurant they used to visit or referencing an activity they once did together. But when it becomes a habit to compare you or your relationship to the one they had with their ex, it’s time to take note.
Let’s say your partner, Austin, keeps talking about how much their ex, Taylor, used to be into doing specific artistic crafts, which makes you feel like you don’t measure up. This behavior isn’t just unfair; it places you in a competitive situation you didn’t sign up for. Comparing you to their ex shows that Austin hasn’t fully moved on emotionally, and that their unfinished feelings may still entangle them.
What to do: Have an open conversation........