How often do stress and anxiety overwhelm you to the point that it is hard to shake them off and focus on what is right in front of you? It may feel like it, but you are certainly not alone. A study from June 2020 found that more than three times as many U.S. adults had reported symptoms of severe psychological stress in April as they had in 2018 (American Psychological Association, 2020).
Having dealt with stress and anxiety from my early teens to my mid-thirties, I used to believe that all I could do was learn to cope with anxiety for the rest of my life. Yet, I overcame and healed my anxiety when I realized that this emotion wasn't the problem but just a symptom of a deeper issue.
Similar to physical pain, which is not designed to torment us but to point us toward a physical imbalance, such as inflammation, a wound, or a growth, anxiety is a natural emotion, a mental red warning light that is supposed to keep us on alert. And just as we wouldn't want to merely cope with or suppress physical discomfort but find out what our body needs, when we are facing anxiety, we should ask ourselves, "What are the deeper emotional and mental wounds that cause us to feel anxious?"
One of them is our core beliefs (Watson, 1989). Early on in our lives, when we were the most vulnerable and dependent on others' support, our mind, in particular our subconscious, created a self-protection system based on the circumstances we were in. Our mind keenly observed whether we were safe, fed, wanted, and loved—and whether others could be trusted, should be avoided, or may need to be pleased to appease them. Based on these observations, our subconscious defines a set of core beliefs to keep us on our toes and prevent us from enduring further hurt, rejection, or disappointment.
The reason why you may have struggled with anxiety is that this early blueprint of self-protection has never been updated. For me, it was the limiting belief that "any time, the other shoe will drop" and "I am only of value when I am achieving........