Keep a Friend From Using You Without Losing the Friendship

When you first meet this friend, they are funny, kind, and real. Yet over time, you discover that they are fairly self-centered, need to control your friend group, and are not shy about using you for what they need. It is both disappointing and maddening, but because you have seen this friend exile other friends who have spoken up, you feel the need to comply. The last thing you want is drama or to be ousted from your crew.

There is one important way to prevent this friend from using you, while remaining in their good graces. But, before we go there, let’s discuss what not to do.

Now, here is what to do. Empathize, but do not enable. When the friend asks you to do something for them and you recognize that you will be exploited, empathize but do not enable.

For example, your friend wants you to help her with a project. In the past, when you........

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