Birthdays are usually depicted as happy celebrations with loved ones gathered, a cake, gifts, laughter, and, if it's a child’s birthday, games and balloons. Even when resources are low, as they are for many people these days, something—no matter how minimal—is often done. If you look on social media, you see all the photos of these eventsl, with everyone smiling and close. While you may know these pictures capture perhaps the peak moment of the day and do not reflect the full reality, you can feel pulled into seeing them as representations of the standard yours must meet.

However, birthdays are more complicated than that. Here are some of the reasons why what seems like it would be a straightforward celebration of someone may bring all sorts of tensions and conflicts.

Your child’s birthday makes the absence of a loved one(s) more palpable and painful—for you and/or your child, especially if no one is prepared for it. Sometimes this begins even a few weeks before the actual date.

Your child may........

© Psychology Today