Why Relationships Matter

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It’s a not-so-well-kept secret. Therapists are nosy. Maybe not all therapists, but c’mon. Who would want to go into a profession where you listen all day to other people’s problems, secrets, quandaries, and so forth? Nosy people. Sure, we want to help you, absolutely. But lots of people want to help others and don’t become therapists. Those people (after a socially acceptable number of minutes of other people going on about personal problems) say, “Dude, you should really go talk to somebody about that.” Therapists can’t say that. They are the somebody.

Over the therapist years, I learned so much more than my nosiness and desire to help others ever suggested I might. And I owe that to all my clients. Thank you, each and every one.

Thank you for making me keep learning, all the time. Whenever you had a problem, it wasn’t that it became my problem, but if I didn’t know about it, I wanted to learn. From reading studies that taught me—for instance—that couples might feel better about each other from discussing movies about other relationships or from writing briefly about a problem from the other person’s perspective; from learning about the scourge and trauma of conversion therapy to really understanding manic episodes, you kept me learning. And learning and learning. That’s one of my........

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