As a college professor for nearly three decades, I find myself often meeting with students who are concerned about what to tell their parents when it comes to declaring or changing a major. Many students embark on their college journey aware of parental expectations related to grades, social life, money, and a slew of other things. But one thing that isn’t always obvious but that eventually rears its head is when students emerge with interests and passions that they know are far afield from their parents’ hopes and wishes.
Many parents have ideas, hopes, and preconceived notions of what their children will gravitate to even before a child is born. These perceptions shape, inform, and dictate purchases of toys and games for small children, and this is also evident in the activities that parents sign children up for when they are young. But it doesn’t stop there.
College students report that their parents want them to be certain things; for example, I have numerous female students who share with me that their mothers, grandmothers, and aunts want them to become nurses, and I have male students who reference fathers getting excited for them to have careers that integrate sports and business. As we can see, these desires often have gendered patterns, and they often reflect either a parent’s choice of career and wanting to see their child follow in their footsteps or represent careers........