Children’s experiences of sibling aggression and abuse remain largely invisible. Mistreated children, parents, and practitioners dismiss many aggressive sibling behaviors—such as pushing, hitting, injuring, constantly ridiculing, and threatening bodily harm—as expected or harmless sibling rivalry. This widely held belief is a major barrier to the recognition of aggressive sibling behaviors, causing many children to suffer in silence.
Survey data demonstrates the frequency and invisibility of sibling harm. The first and only U.S. national survey to measure sibling aggression showed that aggressive sibling behaviors are common. About 36 percent of children in the survey, which was collected from 2008 to 2014, reported incidents in which a sibling assaulted them, threatened them, or even left an injury. This translates to over 26 million American children under 18. Yet, this form of family violence is rarely acknowledged.
The key to understanding the difference between rivalry and concerning sibling behaviors is that rivalry is not about intentionally harming or controlling a brother or sister mentally or physically. In other words, there are no deliberate injuries, purposeful intimidation,........