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Big reactions to sassy, provocative behavior often escalates it and reinforces its power.

Extreme reactions often occur when parents are setting a limit the child doesn't like.

The most effective response is usually to ignore the sass and to follow through on the limit.

Mom: You need to eat at the table.

4 yo: You need to eat at the table.

Mom: I mean it. I will take the pretzels away if you don’t eat them at the table.

4 yo: I mean it. I will take the pretzels away if you don’t eat them at the table.

Mom: You’ll have to take a time-out if you don’t stop copying me.

4 yo: You’ll have to go to time-out if you don’t...say hello! (Giggles maniacally.) Na-na, I don’t have to go to time-out. I didn’t copy you!

This is a transcript from an audio a family shared with me. Their 4-year-old is........

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