When I was recently listening to someone express frustration over his relationship, it didn't take long to realize that this was a two V's or not two V's situation. His significant other was not really allowing him to do one "V," vent, which in turn was making him feel like an insignificant other—meaning he wasn't getting the other "V," validation. That's not surprising because these two V's—venting and validation—should be integral parts of any close relationship, whether romantic or platonic.

Venting is about getting things off your chest—not literally, like a bra or a barbell, but figuratively. It's when you find some way to express and release strong negative emotions such as irritation, frustration, sadness, or anger. The goal is not necessarily to find an immediate solution but to let things out—sort of like a fart—to reduce the stress that's building up inside.

And having such periodic releases is important. Holding pent-up negative stuff can, over time, cause all sorts of emotional, mental, and even physical damage. It can be like squeezing down your pants a giant water balloon that's hooked to a running hose. Instead of waiting for things to explode, it's better to release such negative emotions soon after they emerge, sort of like releasing small amounts of gas from your butt rather than waiting for a gigantic rim-rattling fart to force its own way out when you can't control it. Periodic........

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