Relationships thrive or falter on the smallest of cues: a shared laugh, a thoughtful gesture, or, surprisingly, perhaps, a simple two-word phrase.

Too often, we rely on complaint, criticism, or avoidance to signal what we want. What partners really need is a clear expression of our desires: “I want…”

Why are these two words so powerful? Because they signal want, rather than suggesting blame. Because they articulate current needs, rather than hinting at past neglect.

“I want…” communicates vulnerability and invites connection, which are both essential in relationships.

Saying “I want to spend more time together,” or “I want more support when I’m stressed” is about the future, not the past. It is an invitation for your partner to understand you better. And understanding is one of the deep currencies of relationships.

Psychological research shows that being known and understood by your partner is foundational to how happy you feel in relationships.

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