Tim (not his real name) came to therapy because of the guilt he was feeling about the number of affairs he’d had. He and his college friends had an annual reunion in New Orleans, and in addition to the drinking and partying, they often “picked up girls” for a night or two. Wrestling with guilt now, he wondered if he would feel better if he told his wife and asked for her forgiveness.
Another client, Emily, had fallen in love with a co-worker. They began an affair that lasted almost a year, and Emily was stuck. She wasn't sure whether she wanted to leave her marriage, to be with Phil, and didn’t know whether to disclose her affair to her husband. Phil was pressuring her to decide on her marriage, and this increased her anxiety.
Will the relationship be discovered by someone else? Tim worried that if one of his friends’ wives learned of the antics in New Orleans, she would contact all the other wives to let them know. Would you rather come forward with the “confession” or risk your partner confronting you after discovering your infidelity?
Do you want to stay in your marriage? If the affair is causing strain, your spouse may begin to suspect something. Once they suspect something, they may begin to snoop, going through your phone or credit card charges. Since relationships are built on trust, honesty, and open communication,........