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Wanting things is human, but attaching our sense of okayness to getting them keeps peace out of reach.

We suffer less when we stop arguing with reality and meet this moment as it is.

Peace is not found by fixing the moment, but by allowing it.

Many years ago, I attended a weekly mindfulness gathering. Just above the entrance to the room where the group met, there was a sign that read: Can this moment be enough?

My honest reaction when I first saw those words was a hard no. At that time in my life, I rarely felt like I was enough, or that the moment I was in was enough. Like many people, I was focused on what needed to change (in me, others, or the world) before I could finally relax or feel at peace.

Over the years, as I continued along the path of mindfulness and meditation, that question began to land differently. I started to realize that whether I judged myself or the moment to be insufficient, the facts of reality didn't change. What changed was my state of mind. I could certainly time travel through worry or memory, but the physical facts of the moment remained the same.

The Nature of Wanting

Of course, it’s natural to want things. If you’re single and want a partner, that desire is totally valid. If you’re sick, you want to be well. The idea here is not to stop wanting, it’s to notice how much time we spend living in dissatisfaction rather than actual, factual reality. So often, we fail to notice what’s already enough, and that keeps our minds continuously chasing more.

The mind is a wanting machine. It’s designed to look for the next thing to fix, get, or get rid of. And even when one desire is fulfilled, the mind rarely settles for long. It simply moves on to the next condition:

I'll be happy when I look different.

I'll be happy when I get that job.

I'll be happy when I find a partner or have a different partner.

I'll be happy when I have more money.

I'll be happy when that person changes.

When we treat the present as a mere stepping stone to something better, fulfillment is always postponed. Peace becomes a goal that’s always one improvement away. Living in a constant state of wanting and never-enoughness not only robs us of the present moment, it makes us feel chronically unsatisfied.

When the Moment is Difficult

It’s important to acknowledge that for some people, "this moment" involves immense pain, grief, or fear. If you’re reading this blog from a hospital bed, a place of conflict, or a season of deep loss, the word "enough" can feel impossible.

In these times, "enough" doesn’t mean that the situation is good, or that you shouldn't want it to change. It simply means that for this one breath, you stop the exhausting internal war against the fact that you are here. Acceptance is not defeat, it’s a moment of rest. Even in the hardest conditions, there can be a tiny bit of relief in dropping the "this shouldn't be" channel and tuning into and breathing into "this is what is" channel instead. And remembering that this, too, will pass.

The Non-Negotiable Reality

The truth is, this moment is the only reality we have. Everything else is a story or an image. Wishing this moment were different doesn’t make things magically different, it just adds a layer of tension to our experience.

Judging the moment as insufficient is like spending the entire winter believing we’ll only be okay when spring arrives. We miss the life that’s happening right now, storms, bundled-up evenings, and all. You can’t be in a different body, a different relationship, or a different life in this exact second. Change can happen over time, but this very moment is non-negotiable. When we argue with it and postpone our okayness, we suffer. When we accept it and treat ourselves as kindly as possible, something softens.

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Right now, the truth is simple: You’re reading these words. You’re sitting, standing, or lying down on a surface. This is what’s actually happening. All the "what ifs" and "if onlys" are just thoughts, and unchecked thoughts create suffering.

A Radical Act of Kindness

So, what if we practiced more presence with what’s here? What if we spent less time trying to get somewhere and more time getting here? What if we noticed what’s already happening instead of chasing what we think should be happening? What if we spent more time appreciating what we have instead of focusing on what we think is missing? What if we stopped missing so many moments by thinking about other moments?

We can still move toward our dreams. We can still take action when our inner guidance nudges us. But we do it from a place of flow rather than constant striving.

Life only ever unfolds one moment at a time. Learning to meet this moment just as it is may be one of the most radical acts of kindness we can offer ourselves.

So, the question remains: Can this moment be enough?

© Psychology Today