When Telling Your Story Costs You |
What Is Dissociation?
Find a therapist to treat dissociation
DID is a trauma based survival response, not a spectacle.
Power dynamics in media interviews with trauma survivors are rarely equal.
Consent in trauma storytelling must be ongoing.
Boundary violations can destabilize survivors long after an interview ends.
There is a moment in every survivor’s life when we must decide whether speaking up is worth the risk.
For those of us living with dissociative identity disorder (DID), that decision is layered and deeply personal. DID is not simply a diagnosis. It is a trauma response formed in childhood when safety was not available. It develops as a way to protect a developing brain from overwhelming harm. It is intelligent. It is adaptive. It is protective. It is not theatrical. For decades, DID has been misunderstood and stigmatized. When the media enters the room, the condition is too often treated as spectacle rather than survival. I know this not only as a psychologist who has worked in trauma for nearly twenty-five years, but as someone who lives with DID.
When I agree to be interviewed, I do so intentionally. My hope is always to reduce stigma and increase understanding. I offer both my clinical knowledge and my lived experience. I am clear about my boundaries. I do not discuss certain trauma details. I will not have parts prompted on command. I will not participate in sensational framing. These boundaries are communicated clearly, often in writing, before any interview begins.
Recently, those boundaries were verbally acknowledged and then quietly disregarded.
I paid for that. I paid emotionally. I paid physically. I paid financially.
What many people do not understand is that the power dynamic in interviews with trauma survivors is rarely equal. Journalists hold editorial control. They craft the headline. They select the quotes. They determine what context stays and what gets removed. They shape the narrative in ways that drive readership.
Let's keep it real, with DID, readership often increases when the story brings some shock value.
The requests are often subtle. Can we talk about the most extreme part? Can we describe what switching looks like? Can we include one more detail about what happened?
Each question may seem harmless on the surface. But for someone who lives with dissociation, revisiting traumatic material is not neutral. It can destabilize internal systems. It can create conflict inside. It can fracture stability that took years to build, and that's just the interview. Never mind what happens to DID systems when the narrative that goes to print is not in alignment with what the survivor agreed to participate in.
When a boundary is crossed, the nervous system feels it immediately, and parts can spiral quickly.
After one particular interview, I did not feel empowered. I felt exposed.
There is a difference.
Empowerment feels grounded and chosen. Exposure feels like being emotionally exploited to benefit the public.
Once a story is published, it cannot be retrieved. It circulates without you. People form opinions. Some respond with compassion, others with skepticism, and some with cruelty. The internet does not hold trauma gently, which is one of the reasons I left the social media space in 2025 and took my advocacy and education efforts elsewhere.
For people with DID, who already navigate shame imposed by misunderstanding, this matters deeply.
Media portrayals of DID have long leaned toward distortion. Popular narratives highlight dramatic contrasts between parts, unpredictable behavior, or criminal associations. The clinical reality tells a different story. DID is a survival adaptation, not a spectacle. Most people living with DID are quietly managing careers, relationships, and healing journeys that rarely make headlines.
What Is Dissociation?
Find a therapist to treat dissociation
When journalism prioritizes intrigue or power over accuracy, myths are reinforced. The public is taught that DID is unbelievable or performative. Survivors are left feeling as though they must prove their legitimacy, and scrutiny then replaces true understanding.
Ethical journalism rests on minimizing harm and protecting vulnerable populations. Trauma-informed interviewing requires more than gathering compelling material. It requires pacing. It requires consent that needs to be revisited. It requires awareness that dissociation affects memory retrieval, emotional regulation, and stability long after the interviews end.
Consent is not a single signed agreement. It is an ongoing process.
Ethical coverage of DID would respect clearly stated boundaries. It would center education over entertainment. It would include follow-up after publication.
Most importantly, it would ask whether the story serves healing or exploitation.
Survivors do not owe the public our pain. We are not case studies for entertainment. We are human beings whose nervous systems learned to adapt in extraordinary ways because our environments demanded it.
When boundaries are ignored in the name of storytelling, the harm echoes. It mirrors the very violations that made dissociation necessary in the first place. Being pushed past comfort or exposed without protection is not neutral for someone with complex trauma.
I still believe in storytelling, but I believe in responsible journalism. I believe in conversations that reduce stigma. I believe in survivors reclaiming their narratives. I have seen what ethical storytelling can look like when it is grounded in humility, compassion, and respect. But reclamation must include the right to say no, the right to redirect, the right to withhold details that are not required for public education, and the right to call it out when harm is done. If the media wants to cover DID responsibly, it must slow down. It must prioritize dignity over drama. It must remember that trauma is not content.
The question is not whether DID is newsworthy. The question is whether we are willing to cover it without recreating harm.
As both a clinician and a survivor, I understand the cost of exposure without protection.
“Storytelling is not about shock and awe. It’s about making meaning and cultivating empathy.”-Brene Brown
Brown, B. (2015). Rising strong: How the ability to reset transforms the way we live, love, parent, and lead. Spiegel & Grau.