US News Metro Long Island Politics

Sports NFL MLB Olympics NBA NHL College Football College Basketball WNBA

Business Personal Finance

Entertainment TV Movies Music Celebrities Awards Theater

Lifestyle Weird But True Sex & Relationships Viral Trends Human Interest Parenting Fashion & Beauty Food & Drink Travel

Health Wellness Fitness Health Care Medicine Men’s Health Women’s Health Mental Health Nutrition

Science Space Environment Wildlife Archaeology

Today’s Paper Covers Columnists Horoscopes Crosswords & Games Sports Odds Podcasts Careers

Email Newsletters Official Store Home Delivery Tips

Switch between CA and NY editions here.

Rating 2026 Oscar looks — From the good to whatever the hell Gwyneth Paltrow was thinking

Showing off their bizness

I rate the Oscars four oys. Best gowns were Demi Moore’s Gucci, Nicole Kidman’s Chanel, best of all — Kirsten Dunst’s simple quiet design — perfect. The cut, excellent. An elegant black Celine. No fuss, no feathers, no flowers, no friggin’ beads. Black.

Gwyneth Paltrow’s dressmaker maybe specialized in peeing. Her white gown was wide, WIDE, W-I-D-E open on both sides. Ready immediately to engage a toilet. So practical. Frig the camera. This way she was immediately available for a colonoscopy.

The pre-Oscar chit chat. Nobody’s chest was covered. You could’ve had an MRI while on camera. More hairpieces than a gorilla. Hair down sides of the face. Cheeks tighter than body parts. Boobs peeking out. Sculpted behinds grabbing more space than Mt. Etna. The red-carpet banter? Biden in the can was more interesting.

More From Cindy Adams

Oscar darling ‘Sinners’ might be the perfect movie for our trying times

Steve Carell is........

© New York Post