03-19-2026THE NEW RULES OF WORK

How to grow at work when your manager won’t give you feedback

As you rise, there are fewer people who can guide you. Here’s what to do about it.

[Photo: charlesdeluvio/Unsplash]

“I have no idea if this is what they want me to do. I barely get any feedback.” 

This is a statement I often hear from leaders in my coaching calls, even those at a senior level.When these leaders were early in their careers, there was more frequent guidance and coaching on what success looked like for them and if their work met expectations. However, research by Amy Edmondson shows that the higher you rise in an organization, the less feedback you tend to receive, which can make it feel like you’re losing reassurance. In coaching calls with my clients, we often discover how reliant they were on their leader’s affirmation, and that this recognition served as motivation. 

In addition to getting less feedback from leaders, as your level of influence increases, transparency can decrease. Authority bias can take over as direct reports put their leaders on a pedestal and withhold critical feedback, assuming that their leader knows best or fearing the repercussions of sharing a divergent opinion. 

As you rise, there are simply fewer people in the organization who can guide you on your next steps. Here are some strategies you can leverage to get better feedback at work.

ASK FOR ADVICE INSTEAD OF FEEDBACK

People sometimes hesitate to give feedback, but most people love giving advice. A phrase I often use is this: “I’d love some advice on what I can try next time to make this meeting agenda clearer and more actionable for our group.” Recent research finds that framing the ask as advice rather than “feedback” helps reviewers focus on future-oriented, tangible suggestions instead of only dwelling on past performance.

NURTURE PSYCHOLOGICAL SAFETY

To create an environment where your team feels comfortable sharing advice or feedback, you can model vulnerability (this signals that it’s safe for others to take interpersonal risks). You can also explicitly invite input and questions from everyone (for instance, “What could we improve here?”) and respond in ways that reinforce openness (like thanking people for their honesty). In addition, you can also call out where you saw yourself needing improvement. This might sound like, “I noticed I started rambling at the end of that meeting. Where could I have shortened my message for better clarity?”

AVOID VAGUE QUESTIONS

Vague requests, like asking, “How can I improve this?” can lead to insubstantial or equally vague responses. Instead, focus on clearly defining your goal and ask for advice on how to do a better job reaching that goal. For example, instead of saying, “I want to improve my presentation skills,” you can instead lead with, “I want to improve my presentation flow for clarity and brevity.”It can also be helpful to set the purpose before you make the request. This means sharing why you want the feedback (for example, to be more influential in asking for resources for our team) and how you’ll use it. This can help people frame their thoughts in a way that moves you closer to your goal. If they have a shared interest in your outcome, this also incentivizes them to give you helpful input.

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