At 2:30 a.m. on Saturday, President Trump posted a home video announcing that he was declaring war on Iran. Many Americans were shocked at the news in part because the Constitution requires congressional approval for taking the nation to war. In the weeks before the attack, the Pentagon press office helped distract public attention by promoting exercise videos.

In his State of the Union speech last week, President Trump proclaimed: “Our military is stacked!” Exhibit A for “stacked” is a new video showing Secretary of War Pete Hegseth reportedly bench-pressing 315 pounds. Hegseth is the type of lifter who keeps grunting long after he finishes a lift.

That video helped spur the New York Times to tout the Trump “administration’s very manly week.” A popular Twitter/X account named the Conservative Alternative hailed Hegseth’s lift: “These are the moments that define masculinity, and they are what made Western civilization great.” The bench press video spurred a CNN headline: “This is Trump 2.0, bro. What do you bench?”

I was puzzled by the hoopla because I didn’t think Hegseth’s bench press merited a victory lap. Glenn Jacobs—the mayor of Knox County, Tennessee—has benched 520. Okay, he is the famous wrestler known as Kane, but still—520 is 520. Will Grigg—one of my favorite libertarian writers—posted a video on Facebook of himself doing bench reps with 400 pounds shortly before his untimely death in 2017 at age 54.

I quipped on Facebook: “I bench-pressed that much when I was in high school. Guys past the age of 30 who fixate on their bench press totals tend to avoid mental heavy lifting.”

Hell hath no fury like hypersensitive weightlifters. A thousand angry comments surged onto my Facebook page. Zealots proclaimed that I was a “bolshevik,” “douchebag,” “fucking moron,” “crybaby leftist,” “soyjak,” “old cnt,” “just being a hater,” “fuckin clown,” plus I suffered from “Trump Derangement Syndrome.” Everything I say is........

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