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Cheers and Jeers: Rum and Shots in Arms FRIDAY!!!

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09.10.2021

Late Night Snark: “Reach Out and Gaslight Someone” Edition

"It turns out that OAN is funded—and no one knew this until yesterday—by AT&T. In 2013 they were like, 'You know what this country needs? An even farther-right-wing news network.' And then they pumped tens of millions of dollars into what became One America News, which reportedly promised to offer only positive coverage of AT&T in addition to positive coverage of Donald Trump, Vladimir Putin, hydroxychloroquine, ivermectin, anti-vax conspiracy theorists, Q-Anon, racism, fascism, narcissism, botulism, genital herpes…all the bad things. So good goin', AT&T. That's quite an investment in America."
—Jimmy Kimmel

"The infrastructure bill has been delayed indefinitely. So I guess we'll just cross that bridge when it collapses on top of us."
—Colin Jost, SNL

Continued...

You are now below the fold. Please do feed the naked mole rats.

"Fox News is 25 years old today—the prime age to be harassed by someone at Fox News."
—Trevor Noah

"This should be a no-brainer: just get rid of the filibuster. It's an old rule historically used to preserve racist policies, it's not in the Constitution, and yet it's blocking the United States' ability to stay solvent. Keeping the filibuster would be like an E.M.T. trying to defibrillate someone and going, 'You know, I'd love to save his life but I can't—he's wearing white after Labor Day. He'll be missed…but not in those pants."
—Stephen Colbert

Time for another vacation abroad @TedCruz https://t.co/z8hsMvR0Ks

"Former White House press secretary Stephanie Grisham's new book was released today. You'll find it in the Complicit But Needs Money section."
—Seth Meyers

"This week marks the 50th anniversary of Disney World. To celebrate turning fifty, Disney has opened a new ride: Mr. Goofy's Wild Colonoscopy."
—Michael Che, SNL

And now, our feature presentation…

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Cheers and Jeers for Friday, October 8, 2021

Note: Due to the worldwide disruption in the supply chain, fresh notes are currently unavailable, forcing us to recycle this one from 1920: Harding! Harding! He's our man! He puts Jimmy Cox in da garbage can! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha!!! We apologize for the disruption. —Mgt.

By the Numbers:

Days 'til daylight saving time ends: 30

Days 'til the Natchez Balloon Festival in Mississippi: 7

Drop in covid cases since September 1: 35%

Number of teachers, members of the military, first responders and government employees who will be positively affected by new, relaxed requirements under the Public Service Loan Forgiveness Program: 550,000

Number of Kellogg's cereal plant workers who are on strike for better working conditions: 1,400

Rank of Montana, Kansas, and North Dakota on LawnStarter’s list of best states to start a farm or a ranch: #1, #2, #3

Years since Monty Python's........

© Daily Kos


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