Old words that best sum up our modern times |
I'm torn. Is he a fopdoodle or a cockalorum? Or perhaps a snollygoster? Either way, his devoted gobemouches lap up his torrent of uglyography, taking every evening wheeze as gospel. Even when he sends his heavily armed mutton shunters into his own cities, they applaud. Meanwhile, the rest of the world is completely bumfuzzled by his actions.
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And after reading that opening paragraph you're probably bumfuzzled, too. Understandable because I've used archaic language to describe a very modern phenomenon: Donald Trump. The following translation demonstrates how those expressions still work long after they were forgotten.
"Is he a foolish and vain person or a self-important, excessively boastful man? Or perhaps a clever but unprincipled politician? Either way, his devoted gullible followers who believe everything they're told lap up his torrent of bad spelling and terrible handwriting, taking every piece of fake news as gospel. Even when he sends his heavily armed police into his own cities, they applaud. Meanwhile, the rest of the world is completely perplexed by his actions."
In a world drowning in euphemism and corporate jargon, there's something refreshing about finding two ancient words that sum up all that is loathsome about Donald Trump. It's a hard call between fopdoodle and cockalorum.
But why stop at Trump?
For his infamous stubbornness in the face of popular opinion, we could call Anthony Albanese a mumpsimus. The follicly challenged man he defeated, Peter Dutton, would have been derided for his shiny pate as a fly rink. For his low dive off the planter box, Barnaby Joyce would have earned the term pottle deep foozler. Angus Taylor? In Shakespearean times, he might have been called knotty-pated for his difficulty thinking on his feet in Question Time. And as for the ever-carping Sussan Ley, she'd have been known as a fustilugs - especially after her lectern thumping spray at Penny Wong.
You and I aren't immune either.
During the holiday season, many of us scurryfunged (cleaned up frantically) ahead of the arrival of visitors. We felt........