Breaking: US cabinet votes to remove Trump |
The world is breathing a little easier this morning after stunning developments in Washington overnight.
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At a secret meeting of the cabinet, it was agreed that the 25th amendment of the US constitution would be invoked, removing Donald Trump as president and replacing him with vice president JD Vance.
Section 4 of the amendment allows for the forcible removal of a sitting president who is deemed incapable of performing their duties.
"This was not an easy decision," JD Vance said in a statement after the cabinet meeting. "Just as families must decide when elderly and frail parents can no longer look after themselves, when it is no longer safe for them to drive, as cabinet secretaries after much deliberation, and in light of his recent bouts of incoherence and the resulting global economic crisis, we came to the conclusion that Mr Trump is unfit for office."
Mr Trump was informed of the decision after attending a dinner at the American Geography Society at which he unveiled plans to rename the Strait of Hormuz the Strait of Trump.
He was then bundled into the presidential limousine and taken to the Walter Reed National Military Medical Centre, where he was sedated before being flown to an aged care facility in Florida. Several sources say the facility has built an exact replica of the Oval Office to ease the former president's transition to private care.
In other news, the Australian government has announced tough new restrictions on plastic packaging. From July 1, it will no longer be legal to sell household products in adult-proof packaging. Assistant Minister for Almost Everything including Consumer Affairs Andrew Leigh told reporters the decision came after years of complaints from frustrated consumers.
"Ordinary Australians will no longer take home new scissors only to find they need scissors to get them out of the packaging," he said. Dr Leigh also flagged new consumer regulations making it mandatory for shampoo and conditioner containers to be labelled clearly with a minimum font size that didn't require reading glasses to tell the difference between the soapy and oily........