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Lidl will bring a wee jag of reality to the good burghers of Giffnock

9 7 83

If the great American soul poet Gil Scott-Heron had cared to update one of his classic works he might have changed it to: “The Revolution Will Not Be Televised… But It Might Start In The Lidl Store At Giffnock.” This sanctimonious wee neighbourhood lies a few miles south of Glasgow and has always had a good opinion of itself. Yet it too has encountered challenges.

One of these occurred last year, with the news that the Whole Foods shop was to shut. I’ve only once shopped in Whole Foods, a dispiriting and intimidating experience that I vowed never to repeat. The first rule on entering a branch is to estimate your normal weekly shopping bill and then add 50%. In exchange, shoppers experience an initial warm glow that arises from the knowledge that they are about to embark on a search for comestibles previously unheard of in the then known Greater Glasgow area.

The shop, before its untimely demise, described itself as an “eco-minded chain” purveying “natural and organic grocery items”. It’s not that the shop itself was particularly unpleasant or off-putting (the staff were delightful and all that) – it’s just that, well, I felt that I didn’t really belong there, or that I might have done if I’d first participated in a two-year training course.

I’d never heard of the existence of a naturally gluten-free pancake and waffle almond flour mix or of a Kashi Organic Honey Toasted Cereal and Nature’s Path Kamut Puffs. I was actually tempted to put them in my........

© The Guardian