Have you ever succeeded at something or wanted to do something that others disapproved of? Has someone tried to diminish or ignore one of your goals or accomplishments? Or, maybe they "topped" you by extolling something they owned or did as being superior? At the bottom line, it's jealousy and envy. Worst of all, it doesn't feel good and harms relationships.

What jealousy and envy have in common is that they lack a genuine appreciation for the joy of others. We've all been on the receiving end of such negative or stingy feelings. And, if we're honest, we've done this to others in some form or another. Even a parent who loves a child might express disappointment for that child's chosen path. While not based on envy or jealousy, it still shows a lack of joy or happiness for another's needs and accomplishments.

The good news is that we can overcome these limiting tendencies. It's found in an ancient Buddhist practice for overcoming jealousy, envy, and other feelings that block feeling joyfulness for others.

What is the "One Word" for overcoming jealousy and envy?

It is known as mudita or sympathetic joy. Mudita is one of four elements of Brahamaviharas, or divine abodes (sometimes called the Four Immeasurables). These constitute the qualities and virtues that an enlightened being strives for.

To those scientists who study sympathetic joy, it is known as appreciative joy. The scale to measure appreciative joy shows that it contributes to life satisfaction and positive emotions. When you think about it, this makes perfect sense because being joyful for what someone else has is incompatible with feelings of envy or jealousy. These are very different ways of experiencing and expressing yourself in the world. However, sympathetic joy may not always be appropriate. For example, it is not noble, right, or kind to feel joy over the suffering of others, or over actions that obviously and ethically harm the well-being of others.

Use the practice below to bring sympathetic joy into your life, and world.

Cultivating Sympathetic Joy Meditation

Sympathetic joy signifies a noble, dignified, and highly regarded way of expressing joyfulness for others. This means you can join in to celebrate and support the joyfulness of another. This joyfulness can express itself even if you don’t agree with that person’s path or direction.

You can say these words as a mediation when arising in the morning, or throughout the day. Especially, use them at times when you feel negative emotions.

May I be happy and joyful for the happiness of others.

May I be supportive of the path of others.

May my heart feel warm, generous, and open for what brings joy to others.

Conclusion

Use this meditation daily, letting it become part of you. After a while, you won't have to force feelings of sympathetic joy. They will flow naturally as an outgrowth of the warm generosity of spirit, kindness, and love that others will notice and feel.

(*This post is Certified HI2, written with Human Insight and Intelligence.)